Wednesday, February 18, 2009


I have been down in the dumps lately and found that the only thing that was bringing me comfort was to hand over my life in a very passive observational way to the internet.  I was spending hours of my days just staring and scrolling through blogs and sites that I had seen before and ones that I was just discovering, but as of last night that comfort ceased to exist and I was left with anxious emptiness.  I had been a design blog junky for too long.  My fix just wasn't good enough anymore.  I woke up this morning, more like this afternoon, and tried to check my daily sites. Nothing. I was lost. I thought back to when this down in the dumps feeling started- announced the winner for the NELLE handbag competition.  It was Presidents day.  I was expecting to hear I had won on maybe Tuesday or Wednesday. Surely they would be observing the Bank Holiday. But No, the winner was announced on Monday and it was not me.  I was crushed and confused.  I had shown my entry, for which I was so proud, to my girl friends and my fiance Potsch and even to my therapist - They all loved it and thought it was from a magazine.  So why did I not win?  On Tuesday I checked bklynbride again -This day I am sure to get a mention- Nothing.  Wednesday- nothing.  So, I looked at my entry and decided that it did not matter. I love my entry and I know there are other women (now that I am 30 I am a woman) out there with my style and love for color.  It is time I voice a voice for them. Poor grammar and bad spelling aside I started this blog.  I guess in a way I won something better than "up to 5 handbags for my bridesmaids".
fingers are crossed.

1 comment:

lollibela said...

crap. am i really gonna quote a song for my first comment on your lovely blog? wow...i'm a bigger cheeseball than previously feared.

sean colvin by way of david byrne put it best in that song i was telling ya about..."home, is where i wanna be."

i guess life is a whole bunch of hours spent looking for that place we belong, where we thrive. or in my case, looking for my car keys. regardless, the key is finding beauty in the whole process of flipping up the life's proverbial couch cushions.

and who knows, you might find some change at the same time.



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