Why...

I have been down in the dumps lately and found that the only thing that was bringing me comfort was to hand over my life in a very passive observational way to the internet.  I was spending hours of my days just staring and scrolling through blogs and sites that I had seen before and ones that I was just discovering, but as of last night that comfort ceased to exist and I was left with anxious emptiness.  I had been a design blog junky for too long.  My fix just wasn't good enough anymore.  I woke up this morning, more like this afternoon, and tried to check my daily sites. Nothing. I was lost. I thought back to when this down in the dumps feeling started- www.bklynbrideonline.com announced the winner for the NELLE handbag competition.  It was Presidents day.  I was expecting to hear I had won on maybe Tuesday or Wednesday. Surely they would be observing the Bank Holiday. But No, the winner was announced on Monday and it was not me.  I was crushed and confused.  I had shown my entry, for which I was so proud, to my girl friends and my fiance Potsch and even to my therapist - They all loved it and thought it was from a magazine.  So why did I not win?  On Tuesday I checked bklynbride again -This day I am sure to get a mention- Nothing.  Wednesday- nothing.  So, I looked at my entry and decided that it did not matter. I love my entry and I know there are other women (now that I am 30 I am a woman) out there with my style and love for color.  It is time I voice a voice for them. Poor grammar and bad spelling aside I started this blog.  I guess in a way I won something better than "up to 5 handbags for my bridesmaids".

fingers are crossed.